Middle of the night and there is confusion floating through my brain…too much coffee…too much life….The night is perfumed by farm scents…like I am home in America…tucked into bed with my actor daddy home from New York for the weekend and my artist mommy and the house smells of oil paints and love and comfort and creativity…familiarity…Here at empty space Chiang Mai the momma is a potter and the papa is a german actor who works in New York...the drama is all too similar.
and the farmlands of America must have flown on the breeze across the world to visit in Thailand…cow manure and chickens and the dank smell of irrigation water…I grew up next to a farm and a pond and here I am surrounded by rice fields and lotus ponds...but it is slightly different....spiced with enticingly fragrant foreign flowers telling me that this must be a dream…I must be in Thailand…I must be in the tropics…the longitude and latitude are all wrong for home…dogs are barking and roosters crowing and I fear they too are confused for the morning sunlight is hours away…or do they cock-a-doodle-do to wake something up inside myself…wake up…wake up…wake up….and out of this bizarre dream…this bizarre dream of infinite happiness that will never reach truition because somehow I have gotten time mixed up in my mind…between past present future future past future present…future present tense…present progressive…gerund….do they cry cock-a-doodle-do or eeky-eeky-eeee as they are Thai roosters and therefore must speak Thai more fluently than English…still lost in my dream…and things can be hard here like walking through vanilla pudding….I am afraid of waking up from this dream….waking up and saying goodbye yet again…and again and again and again…and it gets so taxingly depressing that they all turn into ghosts whom haunt my e-mail in-box…. “greetings from Germany, Hola de Honduras, Bonjour du France, Howdy from Colorado, I want to talk to you from New York, ‘Ello from England, Ni Hao from Taiwan.” How many must there be? I am scared of the impending doom of “Sawadee krop from Thailand.” I know it is coming. I, too, am a ghost hovering over a bright screen through the psychic medium of cyber-space…lost in the space-time continuum of I miss you after two years when are you visiting again been thinking of you XOXO.
2 comments:
OK - Just wanted you to know that your blog entries are missed. I check back hopefully every couple days, but you have been silent. I hope that life in Thailand has been treating you wonderfully, and that you have been having too many adventures and meeting too many amazing people (maybe some nice boy?) to add new entries. Thanks for the stories so far!
A faithful reader!
I have been to Taipei too last March and cannot wait to go back again! I look forward to more of your post about Taiwan. HA, thanks for sharing!
Post a Comment